Turkish Ninja

Beware of the ninja! This I found in the web from a Turkish movie. Hope not all ninja can do this, otherwise I will change sides and align with them in some x-kan. They are… oh! so mighty!

Please, make the effort and watch it till the end. Great way to end a fight!!

Publicado en funny, movies. 4 Comments »

El Efecto Vaca

Es un efecto que no deja de sorprenderme. La prueba encarnada de que el ser humano es cotilla sin remisión. El “efecto vaca” es culpable de una gran parte de los atascos y retenciones en nuestras carreteras. Pero… ¿qué es el efecto vaca?

Imagina un hecho inusual en el arcén de una carretera. Más concretamente, imagina que en el carril de aceleración a la salida de un polígono industrial se están preparando apisonadoras y máquinaria para reparar el firme. Imagina que hay obreros poniendo conos, cercando el carril de aceleración. ¿Qué creeis que hacen los conductores que circulan por esa carretera? Efectivamente, desaceleran, frenan incluso, y echan un vistazo a ver qué está pasando ahí. Frena uno, frena otro, desacelera el siguiente, disminuye la velocidad en los dos carriles de la carretera… se produce una retención.

Ese es el efecto vaca. En realidad no pasa nada; ni siquiera han cortado un carril. No ha habido un accidente (entonces se produciría el “efecto rebaño”), no hay un control, ambulancia, bomberos, policía, guardia civil. No. No pasa nada. Pasa que somos unos marujos. Unos marujos atascados en una retención de nueve kilómetros, casi parados, sin saber por qué. Unos marujos cabreados por ir a paso de tortuga. Y sin embargo… sin embargo, al pasar al lado de la apisonadora, nos quedamos mirando, como las vacas.

Nos quejamos de vicio. Somos unas vacas marujas.

Publicado en life. 2 Comments »

Demonstration by Saito Morihiro Sensei

This is Morihiro Saito Sensei in action. Please, note that during the last part of it, filmed on 2001, Sensei was ill with cancer, and could barely move. Even in those conditions, you can feel the martiality of one of the great masters of all time.

I wish I would have been able to train with him. Fortunately, his legacy is still alive in Iwama Ryu, in all of his uchi and soto deshi. I’m fortunate enough to train with one of them, Daniel Toutain Sensei, at least once a year.

IMAF Taikai 2007 at Cala Montjoi

This year’s Taikai at Cala Montjoi has been a complete success. The organization has been just perfect, and the location a good combination of sun, sand, sea and tatami.

We counted with the presence of Jan Janssens (7th dan Aikijujutsu Yoseikan), José Guisado (7th dan Goshin Jujutsu), José Miranda (6th dan Aikijujutsu Yoseikan Ha), Pau Ramon Planellas (6th dan Nihon Kobudo), Juan Antonio Salas (5th dan Aikijujutsu Yoseikan Ha), David Buisán (4th dan Goshin Kenpo), Pere Soler (4th dan Mugai Ryu Iai Heido), Xavier Teixidó (3rd dan Aikijujutsu Yoseikan Ha), Miguel Ángel Ibáñez (3rd dan Aikijujutsu Yoseikan Ha) and others, among the Sensei. The best in their specialities.

We could practice a full weekend of Aikijujutsu, Jujutsu, Nihon Taijutsu, Iaido, Iaijutsu, Aikuchi and other martial disciplines.

I never step out of the “aiki tatami”, where Senseis Janssens, Miranda, Salas, Ibañez and Teixidó did their best to try to teach us some of the techniques of their two different Yoseikan lines. Miranda Sensei’s line, Yoseikan Ha, includes techniques from old schools, usually meaning Daito Ryu, but also Aikuchi, Jo Gatame, etc. We could say (or, at least it seems to me) that this line is more traditional and painful in its forms.

Janssens Sensei’s Yoseikan tends to be more dynamic in its application. Rich in Sutemi Waza, this line doesn’t invest time in making complicated human knots with its ukes. Instead, tori gets rid of his ukes in a quite expeditive manner.

I also attended the Aikuchi class by Miranda Sensei. Those expecting a class in Tanto Dori didn’t get what they were ready for. In this work, it is tori who’s welding the aikuchi (tanto without tsuba), and it is the aikuchi wielder who “wins” in the kata. A very interesting work, from a different perspective.

Saturday night, the attending groups prepared an exhibition in honor of Javier Juarez Sensei, recently deceased. The Spirit of Budo was present all over it, with demonstrations of Aikijujutsu, Jujutsu, Kenpo, Iaijutsu, Nihon Taijutsu, Aikuchi, Jo Gatame, Tambojutsu, even some Hojojutsu… It was a very emotional moment.

At the end, my whole body was acking for a complete day and night… But I loved it! Hope to see you all next year!!

Aikido Dobun (instructive principles) by Morihei Ueshiba

One spirit
Four souls
Three elements
Eight powers

As taught by Sadao Takaoka Shihan, Wakayama Aikikai dojo

Mototsumitama (literally translated as the Great Basic Metaphysical Substance of Being) of the one spirit, four souls, three elements, and eight powers, make up the Great God. The Great God is the living infinite mother who has spread spiritual and physical prosperity throughout space. Space was once empty, with no Heaven and no Earth. Suddenly a pinhole opened up in this empty space.

This pinhole was the very origin of existence. From this hole, Ki of the Great God, which was finer than steam, smoke or mist, gradually came forth to form a circle which surrounded the pinhole and gave birth to the Kotodama of Suu. This birth was not only the birth of the physical world, but of the spiritual world as well.

The universe then began its natural respiration taking a deep breath of expansion, and as it expanded sound flowed from it. This original sound was the kotodama Suu. Suu then continued expanding in four directions and formed a pulsating circle. When Suu has developed it turns into U. The constant work of Suu produced the kotodama U.

The kotodama U, which is the origin of spirit as well as substance, divides into two and works as opposing forces which function independently. Each of these two functions has its own Mitama (spirit). One of these forces flows up and generates the kotodama A, while the other function falls to Earth and creates the kotodama O.

With A going up and O going down an opposing force is created, and held together by Ki, an attraction is formed. Takamagahara (high planes of heaven) represents the universe. It teaches us what the law and order of the universe should be and how the gods reside within it. Everyone s family represents Takamagahara and each individual has Takamagahara within him/herself.

All the elements of this universe constantly breathe and flux and live every moment of our lives. In other words, Takamagahara is the great celestial globe which has successfully accomplished its formation and wishes. It is the very origin of creation of heaven and earth. To come to understand the wishes of Takamagahara and pursue the tasks of the gods to satisfy their will is Aikido. Clarify the Ki of space, the Ki of the self-curdling island (Onogorojima), the KI of the universe, and all the ways which mitama come into your body. Make all the breathings of the universe match your own. Use these lines as the law, and make them accomplish the mission of the universal heaven. The basic principle to pursue in each direction is called Aikido.

Aikido should be the doctrine endowed by god to clarify the workings of the universe. The past, the present, and the future are the routes which the universe should follow. This includes the human body, as it has the universe within it. Purify the universe and harmonize it with the three worlds of the manifest, the spiritual, and that of the gods. Following this continually is Aikido.

The core of the universal dynamism consists of 75 sounds. Each one of these sounds obeys three rules: triangle (Iku-musubi), circle (Taru-musubi), and square (Tamatsume-musubi). The kotodama, A, O, U, E, I, manifesting the mind of the Founding god (Kuni no Katachi no Kami), interacting with the neutral god (Toyokumo no Kami), the functions of the Five gods came into being. When the eight powers interact with each other, the light, pure ones went up to the heavens, and the heavier, impure ones fell to the Earth.

Each time the heavens and the Earth interacted, some functions fell to Earth, expanding it. This was done by the god of Tamatsume-musubi. With the three elements, Iku-musubi, Taru-musubi, and Tamatsume-musubi, influencing the process, the universe grew and continues to grow today. Aiki is this interaction and use of kotodama. It is the one spirit, four souls, three elements, and the eight powers.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, one hundred, one thousand, one million, and the great Mitama of all These words represent the one spirit, four souls, three elements, and the eight powers. Ueshiba Sensei never failed to recite these words in his prayer before and after Aikido practice in order to teach us to assimilate ourselves within the universe.

By doing so, we can produce techniques which make the three elements visible in the manifest world. Wishing for world peace, Ueshiba Sensei always preached that human beings are also a part of the universe.

The Three Elements

Ueshiba Sensei told us in his Dobun that the Three Elements are gas, liquid, and solid. After studying this for a long period of time, I came up with my interpretation for this. I think that these three elements are three stages. When O Sensei said gas, he wanted to tell you to match your breath with that of your opponent.

Liquid indicates that you should absorb your opponent’s strength. Solid implies that you should use your breath and perform the technique. In other words, in the gas stage we should lead our opponents with our Ki. In the liquid stage we should assimilate ourselves with our opponent. In the solid stage we gradually apply ourselves in the desired directions to complete the technique.

The Four Souls

Historically in Japan four separate aspects of functions of mitama have been recognized. The first is Kushimitama, or the heavens, which give light to all things in order to purify their KI. The second is Sachimitama, or the Earth, which lavishly provides and never expects anything in return. The active and valiant Aramitama, or fire, is indispensable for any type of development. The harmonious Nigimitama is the water that can flow anywhere and rules the Earth.

The Eight Powers

The eight powers are always contrastive to each other. Moving force and stopping force, dissolving force and curdling force, pulling force and releasing force, joining force and separating force, work actively in the universe to sustain life and the Earth. This is also true within ourselves, as we are part of the universe and have a universe within our bodies. I draw an analogy from the Ken-zen-ichi-jyo sword tactics which were written in the twelfth century.

In Ken-zen-ichi-jyo we learn that if an opponent gives you his full 100% attack, you should receive the attack with zero. If he gives you 90% then you receive it with 10. 80-20, 70-30, 60-40, 40-60, 30-70, 20-80, 10- 90, 0-100. I believe this is much easier to understand than the definitions given by O Sensei. If we meet 100% with 100% we end up with a 50-50 connection and we cannot proceed with the desired function.

Fire and water are two basic examples of the opposing powers. Fire naturally flows vertically, while water flows horizontally. Water puts out fire, and fire evaporates water.

Many people ask about Aikido with relation to religion. I don t believe in religions because I know that history has seen a lot of conflicts among religions which have caused many great battles. Instead I believe in the god of fire and the god of water. It is such a simple concept that I wish people all over the world could come to support the idea.

The final set of contrastive powers is positive and negative. When explaining these two forces I use the terms plus and minus. Correct breathing is critical to using these forces effectively. Take a breath as you pronounce A, O, U, E, I. Try to let your body learn to breathe the kotodama, and not your brain. In doing so you will not need commands from your brain to move as quickly as possible.

In Aikido, zero (or nothingness) is necessary most of the time. Kokoro (heart and mind) is one thing while Ki is something else. Many people believe that they are identical, but it they are not. Heart and mind remain innocent for your entire life, while Ki is always fluctuating. You must purify yourself to become nothing. What you do in Aikido never fails to reflect the state of your Ki. If your Ki is clouded, you cannot accept or lead your opponent. I really hope that everyone can learn to master the Aikido that Ueshiba Sensei taught and lived.

Timofónica (y 4º entrega)

¡Albricias y zapatetas! ¡Ayer me pusieron la línea los de Telefónica! Poco les va a durar, hoy mismo llamo a Jazztel

Pero, por todos los dioses del Olimpo, ¡qué paz!

Publicado en life, technology. 1 Comment »

Timofónica (3º entrega)

Hoy me han llamado de INTELSIS, la empresa instaladora. “Por fin me ponen el telénono”, me digo a mí mismo. Ya se sabe, la esperanza… ¡Pero no! Es para echarse a llorar, pero me dicen que confirme que mi dirección es correcta. Y no. Claro que no. Claro que vuelve a ser incorrecta. Claro que vuelve a ser la misma dirección que ya me he cansado de decir en el 1004 (menos mal que es gratuíto) que está mal.

Por supuesto, la chica de INTELSIS me ha dicho que ella no puede hacer nada más que volver a devolver la orden de instalación. Por el mismo motivo que ya la ha devuelto antes.

Si antes era para ir con un tanque… ¿no es ahora acaso como para quemar en la hoguera a todo el personal del 1004?

El culebrón completo en: http://flintstonecom.blogspot.com/2007/05/timofnica.html y en http://flintstonecom.blogspot.com/2007/05/timofnica-2-entrega.html.

Publicado en life, technology. 2 Comments »

Carta de un Currante Indignado

Esto lo escribió un currante indignado… Y me ha lelgado a la bandeja de entrada esta mañana.

Dada la mierda que nos escupe diariamente la tele, radio, prensa y demás medios de comunicación, un grupo de disidentes hemos elaborado este manifiesto a favor (sí, A FAVOR) de la piratería.

Si te mola, pásalo. Si prefieres creerte las mentiras de la industria, haz con él lo que te salgo del arco del triunfo.

De: el currante medio, aplastado por la hipoteca, la precariedad laboral, los horarios DE MIERDA y otros abusos sociales, como la caña de cerveza a 2 putos Euros.

A: este músico mediático que se duele detrás de unas gafas de sol en la Moncloa, forrado de pasta hasta los pendientes. Tiene cojones ir de rebelde por la vida y terminar en las escaleras del centro del Estado (por si no captáis las sutilezas, el ejemplo se refiere a Alejandro Sanz, aunque es extensible a todos los
membrillos / impresentables que le acompañaban en “la casita del Zapatero”).

Mira, chavalote, en la gira que te vas a marcar este verano vas a ganar más pasta -haciendo algo que te gusta y que en teoría te llena- de lo que ganaré yo en toda mi puta vida de currito, cargando, además, con una actividad que no me aporta nada personalmente y con la que, si no fuera por el sueldo adicional de mi pareja, ni siquiera me daría para pagar el piso donde vivo.

“La música está muy mal” – gimes. Tú, chavalote, no sabes lo que es estar mal. ¿Qué sabes tú de hipotecas, de rebotar de un contrato a otro, de currar a turnos o de 7 a 7? ¿Qué sabes tú de llegar a fin de mes, o de lo que me cuesta a mí plantearme tener hijos con lo que piden en una guardería? Porque te recuerdo que aquí, en el mundo real, curramos dos para pagarnos 70 metros cuadrados.

“La gente que compra en el topmanta no ama la música” – escupe otro. ¿Con qué validez moral exigís vosotros, que vivís a todo trapo de camino entre Madrid y Miami, sin saber ni el dinero que tenéis, al currante que os pague los vicios y haga multimillonaria a la multinacional de turno? ¿Cómo se puede tener la cara de plantarse en plan víctima sobre una vida de lujo?

La industria ha abusado -y abusa- con los precios y las calidades. Sólo ahora que se ve con el rabo en el culo ofrece lo que no pueden dar los piratas: DVD´s con vídeos, extras y demás. Todo, curiosamente, al mismo precio que antes. ¿No llorabais que no se podían bajar los precios? Cómo vale ahora un álbum que lleva 12 canciones en el CD y 16 en un DVD (verídico) lo mismo que antes el mismo álbum con el CD a pelo? ¿Cómo puede valer un mismo álbum en España 18 euros y en Alemania 20 (contrastado) cuando los alemanes ganan más del doble que un español? Ahora que las mafias e Internet os revientan, ahora, que ya no tenéis la sartén por el mango, pasáis de la posición dominante y abusiva a la apelación más rastrera de sentimientos.

Pues yo, y muchos como yo respondemos: AHORA, QUE OS DEN POR CULO. NADIE puede pedirme que le pague la colección de coches de lujo, el yate y las cuatro casonas en Miami, la Sierra o Marbella. NADIE puede pedir moral desde la inmoralidad.

Bustamante se acaba de comprar una casa de 500 kilos de las antiguas pesetas en solo CUATRO AÑOS DE CARRERA MUSICAL, claro ejemplo de lo mal que está el panorama musical.

Firma. Cualquier anónimo hasta los huevos de sandeces.

PD: Cópialo, pégalo y pásalo.

Puedes estar de acuerdo o no, pero lleva razón en muchas cosas. Si los salarios estuvieran a otro nivel, el problema se vería de otro modo.

Publicado en culture, life. 2 Comments »